Several months ago I was shopping at the J.Crew outlet in Riverhead (shocking, I know) and a nice salesperson came over to help me sort through a stack of shirts. He looked at me strangely for a second and started to say, “Did you…” In this moment I realized he knew me from somewhere and I quickly started scanning through everyone I went to high school and college with.

Apparently I was scanning the wrong places.

He didn’t say, “Did you go to Binghamton?” or “Did you go to Commack?” Nope. It was, “Did you used to teach in Westhampton Beach? You were my English teacher!”

Ew.