I want that immediately right now

I’ve been thinking about this sense of immediate availability that has pervaded our culture. I think we’ve all heard a lot about the instant gratification that we have become accustomed to. Cue old person hissing, Booooo, kids today…

I notice it with students more and more each year. It appears in the general lack of attention  in class:

“Please double-check to make sure your names are printed in the books before you return them. I can’t give you credit for returning the book without your name in it. Are all your names in the books?”

Five minutes later…

“Ok, so I got back six books with no names. Who didn’t write your name in the book?”

It also comes up in their inability to stick with something. When asked to research a topic on a database with thousands of articles:

“Ugh, I can’t find anything. There’s nothing here for my topic.”

“How many articles did you read?”

“The first half of this one.”

The ugly truth is that I notice it in myself as well. When browsing through Facebook on my phone, if I tap to open a photo or video and it doesn’t open in, I don’t know, two and a half seconds, I close it. “Baaah, nevermind.”

But now the worst part is I see it in Nolan, and he’s only two and a half. Nolan doesn’t watch a lot of television and when he does, he watches the same two or three things. We keep a bunch of Sesame Street and some similar shows on the DVR so that when we feel like giving him some time in front of the tv (that’s parent speak for, sweet lord I need twenty minutes to myself), we can put on a specific episode of a show. In his mind, all the shows he likes are available all the time.

I didn’t think about that having any sort of negative effect until we were upstairs recently and I offered to put on the tv in my bedroom while I got ready. Nolan said, “I want to watch Sid.” I explained that I would have to see if Sid the Science Kid was on at that moment, and he looked at me like I was talking about astrophysics. I could see his little brain working, IF it’s on? Of course it’s on. Push buttons on the remote and pass me a binky. Needless to say it wasn’t on. After I put on something else he just kept asking for the specific shows he wanted, “I want Rosita’s grandma Sesame Street. I want Elmo’s grandparents Sesame Street.” I explained that we have those saved downstairs, but I’m fairly certain he thought I was lying to him.

Now this has spilled over onto music. He has finally taken pity on us and started asking for music other than Music Together, but the concept of the radio is totally lost on him. If he asks for “I Don’t Care,” I can play it from my phone. If he asks for “Pompeii” or “Gone Gone Gone,” I say it’s not on the radio right now. Again, totally puzzling to him.

Do I pretend iTunes doesn’t exist because I’m going to create an impatient monster, or do I embrace the availability of everything? Dr. Spock didn’t cover this in his books.

What’s in a name?

Many people have asked us where we came up with the name Nolan and I’m sorry to say I don’t have an entertaining story. I had a student a few years ago with the name and I liked it. I think we came across it in a baby name book and it slowly worked its way up our maybe list to our #1 spot.

What HAS been entertaining are the names people have THOUGHT we named him.

Matt called his 95-year old grandmother in Florida a few hours after Nolan was born and when he tried to deliver the happy news, it went like this:

“His name is Nolan!”



“I can’t hear you!”


“Oh!!” (finally relieved she heard him) “Myron! Wonderful!”

Finally, Matt spelled it and all was cleared up.

A few days later, my dad’s job kindly sent us a basket with fruit and snacks and I was simultaneously amused and horrified when I read the card congratulating us on the birth of our son Norton. Norton??

Ghetto Mama

Last week my friend June and I took our babies for a nice, long walk around Cantiague Park. June had her daughter a week before I had Nolan and it has been great having a friend in the exact same place I am. Nolan was looking pretty ghetto that day and June suggested I snap a picture as evidence. So I did.

Exhibit A of Ghetto Mama: Yes, those are band-aids on his fingers because I am incapable of cutting his nails. Everyone says, “Cut them when he’s sleeping!” That’s a great idea except that we swaddle him so his hands are totally unavailable. I am now banned from using the nail clippers and can only use the file, which takes forever.

Exhibit B: I prop his head up with a diaper so he won’t break his neck.

Nolan Visits the North Fork

Although we headed to the North Fork once or twice during my pregnancy, the reality is that if you’re not tasting the wares, it’s not so fun … especially when everyone around you is swirling and sipping and enjoying. All that was forgotten Thursday when Matt and I (and Nolan) headed to two vineyards and then had a lovely dinner. Going to the North Fork during the week is ideal because you avoid any traffic and the tasting rooms aren’t crowded. One-on-one time with the staff is usually fun and informative and they are often much more generous when it comes time to pay the bill if no one else is around.

I picked up Matt right after work and off we went! During the week, most tasting rooms close on the early side (between 5 and 6) so check with the individual vineyard you are visiting. First, we stopped at Paumanok in Aquebogue. We had never been here but I tasted their Sauvignon Blanc at A Mano and it was so amazing that Matt gifted me four bottles after I had Nolan. I asked for an IV of it while I was in the hospital but surprisingly, the staff would not oblige. It turns out their steel-fermented Chardonnay is delicious as well. Both wines are perfect for summer so bring one to a bbq! Preferably at my house.

After Paumanok, we took the short ride to Sherwood House’s Jamesport location where we sipped some more and had a few good laughs with Ami and the guy who is really nice whose name I never remember. The people who run Sherwood House are seriously the FRIENDLIEST people ever. Go there already!

Me and Nolan snuggling

 Me and Nolan again, this time he is trying to peek his eyes open, but that Ergo Baby is just too damn comfy

After Sherwood we had another delicious dinner at A Mano in Mattituck – great food, wine and dessert. Before heading home I had the pleasure of breastfeeding in my car in a parking lot, which I’m getting better at. It’s not too bad, especially if I’m not driving. Kidding!! Don’t call CPS; I don’t nurse and drive.